Saturday, April 30, 2016

habit gravity and escape velocity






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April 30, 2016

Habit Gravity & Escape Velocity


This last month has been my most intense and positive month of training of a lifetime. And that’s saying something as I have done a lot of intense training over the years. 

Training #! was in Clinical Hypnosis or more accurately the process of generative coaching and psychotherapy as thought my F&M Stephen Gilligan. 

The second training I told you about already, was five days of Motor Officer Motorcycle Safety training. 

#3, of which I am right in the middle of, is training in Jeff Walker’s Product Launch Formula. The first product I am launching is actually me. Dr. Dave version 3.0. The next product I intend to lhelp aunch is version 3.0 of you! 

One of the most helpful metaphors of launching I have ever heard Is from Eben Pagan. (His pen name is David DeAngelo and his first book is still available Double Your Dating for Men). He taught me about habit gravity. 

Whenever we attempt something new we have to escape the habit gravity of our old habits. In a real rocket launch almost all of the energy burned is used when the rocket struggles to leave the ground until it reaches escape velocity. That’s all I have time for this morning, so I will leave that with you to ponder how it applies
 to anywhere or any way that you are currently attempting your own launch. 

As always, thank you very much for your attention and your conversation. 




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Copyright © 2016 David O. Aspenson, Ph.D

Friday, April 29, 2016

A mathematical formula for life





Dave's Daily Dig
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April 29, 2016

Sorry I missed you yesterday. I woke up this morning and realized I didn’t send yesterday’s post. I wrote it on the plane to Phoenix, Arizona.  But by the time I arrived at my final destination in Apache Junction, my brain was a little addled apparently. I was also distracted when I arrived by left over bratwursts and Mom’s macaroni salad.  Anyway…



E + R = 0 


The formula stands for Events+ Responses = Outcome

I heard this formula first from Jack Canfield ( one of the originators of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series) in his book Principles of Success. He learned it from some other unnamed therapist. I think it may have it roots in Warner Erhard’s EST training.  

What do you think this formula means or why it might be useful? 

I think it is very useful because most people, (including me when l forget), go about their life assuming that Events = Outcomes. I will say more later about that.

Share your thoughts, comments or questions on Help for Midlife & Beyond, or send me an email at DrDave@DavidAspenson.com.

A good friend wrote to me last week and asked if I could send her the daily posts in a digest form. I decided that was a good idea. So this is what I am going to do - for now. (This is an organic project for me, so I am going to let evolve in what ever way it wants to as part of my conversation with you.) 

I am going to begin sending a weekly digest of the week’s daily posts to my subscribers. If you would like to actually see them daily, go to Help for Midlife & Beyond and click on the blue button that says Join. Or you can just send me an email at DrDave@DavidAspenson.com that says Daily Please and I will send it directly to your Inbox. 

As always, thank you very much for your attention and your conversation. 




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Copyright © 2016 David O. Aspenson, Ph.D

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

the poets say it best


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April 26, 2016



As I proclaimed yesterday - the poets say it best

and my favorite poet, David Whyte completely mapped out the process of personal transformation in his poem Coleman's Bed

Click here for a recent reading of the entire poem. ( I promise this link will work.)

After thirty years of helping people with their transformation, and in the process embracing my own, I have not seen the soul's mechanics of lasting change captured better anywhere than in this single poem.


Make a nesting now, a place to which
the birds can come, think of Kevin's
prayerful palm holding the blackbird's egg
and be the one, looking out from this place
who warms interior forms into light.




Remember holding a delicate bird's egg? 

Remember how it almost feels like it could float above your hand weightless? 

If no one is looking, or if you don't care that they are,

go ahead and hold your palms in that prayerful position.

Take a moment to imagine and feel them holding that delicate egg.

In these palms you can warm your own interior forms into light.

If you are not sure what those forms might be...think of the most vexing problem you are having in your work on your self.

That is one of your interior forms in need of the warmth of your light. 

Hold him or her - nestled right there in those prayerful palms -

and linger a little while

before dashing off to whatever the next business of the day might be.




* Says my friend and mentor Stephen Gilligan who, more than anyone, opened me again to the poets I had abandoned.


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Copyright © 2016 David O. Aspenson, Ph.D

Monday, April 25, 2016

The entire process of transformation


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April 25, 2016


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The poets say it best.* 

My favorite poet, David Whyte completely mapped out the process of personal transformation in his poem Coleman's Bed

After thirty years of helping people with their transformation, and in the process embracing my own, I have not seen the soul's mechanics of lasting change captured better anywhere than in this single poem. Though much of Mr. Whyte's work speaks to me deeply, I am giving Coleman's Bed my main attention this year. 

The opening metaphor of this powerful poem is:  "Make a nesting now, a place to which the birds can come".

As this year began, after a long descent during which I was tempted to give up, I formed the intention to "make a nesting now". 

I decided to make a nesting now, not later, not someday. I had been thinking about it for decades. I had written about it. I had tried mightily to help others make their nest. But I decided, finally, to make a nesting for my own self.

...a place to which the birds can come. 

Every morning I sit and have coffee with my MSOBF (most significant other by far).  We watch the cardinals, woodpeckers, and chickadees come to our feeders.  Every morning they remind me to keep working on my nest. 

You can hear the entire poem on the replay of today's Lunch Break for Inner Nourishment.  (Click here for the replay.)

Perhaps tomorrow we will talk about "Kevin's prayerful palm holding the blackbird's egg".  


* Says my friend and mentor Stephen Gilligan who, more than anyone, opened me again to the poets I had abandoned. 

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Copyright © 2016 David O. Aspenson, Ph.D

Saturday, April 23, 2016

The free will vegetarian


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April 23rd, 2016

The Free Will Vegetarian

I was skyping with my daughter Anna recently who told me something that, in my unbiased opinion, is both brilliant and very powerful. (She is currently in Guatemala on her first post college job working for Mayan Families  who provide support for impoverished Mayan families. (I’m so proud of her I could burst.)
I was talking with Anna recently about food and her path toward vegetarianism. She said, with a cheerful but fierce demeanor, 
“I’m a free will vegetarian”.  
  
Meaning, if she feels like having a piece of bacon she may well eat it. Someone else might object and point out that a vegetarian should not eat meat. She says, “Hey, I ‘m a free will vegetarian”.  I laughed as she reminded me of the Christian denomination called the Free Will Baptists (as opposed to the Baptists who believe that God has already decided and predetermined everything that is going to happen and everything we are going to do.)   

Anyway I think she means that she is determined that her VEGETARIANISM not become her master.   
&*% ISMs of all kinds (communism, capitalism, socialism, Catholicism, paganism, fruitarianism etc. etc.) often become our cruel masters. Or we tend to make them into our masters. The $%#ISM tells you what you MUST do. Then, typically in this process, you begin telling others what they MUST do.  At that point - you are inviting others into your own cage. 
 
My daughter has located her free will at a very young age and as she holds on to it - I know it will serve her well.  She will be a free will employee; a free will change-agent; a free will citizen of the United States (there are a lot fewer of those than we let on); a free will daughter; a free will intimate partner… 
A woman in the world with her own will.  
What a power she has claimed for herself.  How she has inspired her Dad to live free. 
As Errol Flynn, the classic actor in early adventure films, said when asked how he was able to demonstrate such artistic swordplay – 
“Hold your sword not too tight and not too loose” *





I will be moving this blog out of ICONTACT pretty soon.  Subscribe here to Help for Midlife & Beyond to continue receiving Dr. Dave’s Daily Dig.
 

*From The Courage to Love: Principles and Practices of Self-Relations Psychotherapy by Stephen Gilligan



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Copyright © 2016 David O. Aspenson, Ph.D



Re: In praise of the Earth

April 22, 2016 
 
 
 
 
Dave's Daily Dig
 
For anyone digging deep for the hidden treasure
to change their life and world for the better
 
 
 
 
Sorry, I was in a bit of rush last night to send out my dig before going on a date with my MSO and sent it out with a day old title.   Here is my Earth Day tribute a day late.
 
 
 
 
 
Today's post honors Earth Day
with Cindy's amazing photographs
& John O'Donohue' beautiful blessing
 
Click Here for the entire Blessing
 
(you won't want to miss these photos)
 
 
 
Copyright © 2016 David O. Aspenson, Ph.D

Thursday, April 21, 2016

Esemplastic


April 21,2016

Dave's Daily Dig
For anyone digging deep for the hidden treasure
to change their life and world for the better

 




Esemplastic *

Between the borders
Of the Old North State, the Old Dominion
And Touring Heaven
As you roll up the throttle
You flap roll to a stop,
Someone let the air out of your tires.
Well Hell.
As you approached your new domain,
A territory yours, yet unclaimed
You've again been challenged, checked
Thwarted
A once and future midnight rider
and Sunday glider
This time, will you be mired
in the mud of the might have been past
And the foggy future of never was?
Will you gather the tears of frustrated confusion
And use them to fuel your ride
Into surrendering victory?
In your hand you hold the key
To ignite your fired dreams.
Though it might be missed
When gazing
Through the empty, unfulfilled
mist at the border
The sought for prize still exists
Just there, on the other side


Inspired by David Aspenson, at the border
From Paul Bramblett  (4/21/2016)


* The title word was invented by Samuel Taylor Coleridge 
and means the unifying power of the imagination'.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esemplastic



 



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Copyright © 2016 David O. Aspenson, Ph.D